Is self doubt ever useful?
- JK - Where The Mind Grows
- Apr 15
- 3 min read
Self-doubt often gets a terrible reputation. We're told to banish it, overcome it, and never let it hold us back.
But what if you’ve been looking at self-doubt all wrong?
What if this uncomfortable feeling actually serves an important purpose in our personal growth?
With a life and career coach perspective, dealing with our emotions (all of them) is something that requires compassion and curiosity.
It's not about just not feeling them; they all have a function after all. Otherwise, why are we wired to know & feel them?
Yet, as the clients I work with learn. Finding our sense of control and boundaries with these feelings and their experience. Finding a sense of freedom in responding to what could be debilitating. Helping our brain ‘rewire’ its connections so these feelings become clear and useful messages, not just generalised versions of ourselves, showing up when we could be exploring the situation with other ways of being.
That’s where things can change
Self-doubt is not always the enemy. It might come in different packages too, from scrutiny to feeling unsure, from caution to negative self-talk—with the right frame and relationship to ‘self-doubt’ it can become a valuable resource for self-awareness and enhancement in our life.
Doubting ourselves creates space for reflection. This pause allows us to examine our motivations, assumptions, and potential blind spots.
Rather than letting it become the truth of the matter. Turn your self-doubt into a roll call for your ‘curious detective mode’ to switch on.
‘Ooh incoming message, self doubt has something for us to consider?’
One of my JKism’s is ‘The issue, is not the issue’ and in the context of ‘self-doubt’, there is a wider message for us to hear in this fear-based narrative.
Perhaps we need some more knowledge or skills?
Perhaps doubting ourself is actually about trusting others?
Perhaps deep in your heart, your values are calling for you to find a different environment in which you can better nourish yourself.
Yep that’s right. Self-doubt might simply be an alarm bell to let you know you're called to a different path (Not always, of course, but this often comes up)
Rather than rushing forward with unwavering certainty, self-doubt invites us to ask important questions: "Have I considered all perspectives?" "What might I be missing?" "Is there a better approach?"
Self-doubt also keeps our meaty little ego in check. Those who never question themselves are more likely to make avoidable mistakes, be impulsive and might have moved on before they have the chance to reap beneficial learning.
A healthy dose of doubt creates humility—the foundation for genuine growth.
But should we still call it self-doubt then?
In coaching, clients often find that growing their understanding of these ‘pesky’ problem states brings compassion and a change of view.
Seeing self-doubt for its ‘best intention’ allows us to reframe it with a new more beneficial function, a chain reaction if you like.
Maybe self-doubt ‘rebrands itself. As ‘protection’ or ‘cautiousness’.
Of ‘Self-Guidance’ or imagined as a little helpful creature that helps you take that crucial breath and reflection of understanding.
And with that the feelings shift too.
Working with and through self-doubt builds resilience. Each time you acknowledge uncertainty yet take action anyway, you develop greater confidence in your ability to handle whatever comes. A feedback loop of self-reflection that allows you to more deeply connect with yourself. The process of curiously questioning, evaluating, and then proceeding builds a stronger sense of self than blind confidence ever could.
Learning to see how self-doubt, as part of you, can work for you rather than against you.
Helping you grow your emotional intelligence.
When doubt arises, acknowledge it, extract its wisdom, and then make a conscious choice about your next step. Just as the natural ecosystem accepts all feedback as a means to plan, prepare and weather all seasons.
Confidence and courage isn't the absence of doubt—it's the willingness to move forward with knowledge from it.
Successful, happy people are rarely free of doubt themselves, but those who learn to shift their doubts into deeper understanding and more thoughtful action and even be grateful for how it can help, with the right view.
It's time to reframe self-doubt, not as a flaw or the truth that you can’t do something, but as a sign of inner wisdom, self-awareness, and an opportunity to understand yourself more deeply with an invitation to step into your capabilities.
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